This post is not about parodies, Death or even Idiopathic Anaphylaxis. This post is about the English language and the hilarious snippets which I overheard (they talked way too loud) or from conversations which I had or read. Some made me cringe, smile or burst out laughing. And since laughter is the best medicine, let me share today's post and tickle your funny bone.
1. Excuse me, I can waiting here?
2. I is not knowing. I is do not know.
3. Hello, my nang is ..... (He meant NAME)
4. If you wants to knows more about this particular product, you can seeing Mr. So and So.
5. I cannot speaking English very well. But I WRIKE quite well. (Yes, I can tell that you WRITE extremely well.)
6. Do not running. If you running very fast, you will falling down on your face and it will be brokeRNS.
7. Blinks-blinks that I own. (She meant bling-bling! But it makes me wonder to how many blinking eyes we can own!)
8. If you do not understands the questions, you can always askings me.
9. Is your ear paining? Do you feel paining if I press this part?
10. Conversation between nurse and patient (double-checking patient's data before procedure)
Nurse: When is your birthday?
Patient: My birthday not yet arrive. My birthday long time more.
Nurse: .............. When you born?!
Patient: Oooohhhh... You want my date of birth, you mean.
Nurse: Yes, your BIRTHDAY. I want your BIRTHDAY!
11. (Just before the school bell rings)
A mother: It is going to be 3.30pm. My childrens will be finished soon.
Finished INDEED!
Does pigeon English drive you nuts? Oddly enough, it doesn't bother me unless it's so bad I have no idea what they are saying then I just feel frustrated. I knew a woman who said it drove her nuts, but she was really racist and felt if "they can't speak English, they shouldn't be allowed to live here [USA]." I, on the other hand, feel all kinds of admiration for people in the USA who are trying to speak English, even if it's half way right. Perhaps because I remember how horrifying it was for me to travel to non-speaking countries knowing my use of their language must have been an atrocity. But I did try. Of course, the people who move to the USA and don't even try to learn the language, I wonder why.
ReplyDeleteSpeaking English in your part of the world must be equated with education? You are very educated so it must drive you nuts to hear people speak English poorly?
Our English was very good once upon a time! Now everything has gone down hill. It's not only our English, even the MAths and Science.
DeleteI do not consider myself very educated even though I hold a first class honours degree. I feel that there is so much in life to learn that even if we live 10 lives, we can never finish learning. It is the attitude that I cannot stand. The attitude of not wanting to learn. Even when what we can learn is right in front of us.
Yes, we are taught English. But the standards of our English today is TERRIBLE. I am lucky because my dad was a journalist and my first language was English.
Our English has seriously gone down hill.
Read the following and you will see where I am coming from:
http://www.themalaysianinsider.com/sideviews/article/a-re-look-at-the-malaysia-education-blueprint-hussaini-abdul-karim/
I think education as a whole has gone downhill in many places. Maybe it's not valued as much? Maybe due to technology? With things like spellcheck, I can't imagine people care if they learn how to spell if a machine can do it for them. Calculators...why learn math? Most people working in stores don't even know how to count back money because their computerized cash registers do it for them so they just hand back the change.
DeleteYes, and when the cash registers break down, I have to count and tell them how much change they have to give me!!!!!!!!!
DeleteLOL! Yeah, I know the feeling. It gives me an opportunity to practice my snooty eye rolling when the cashier looks at me like she's clueless.
DeleteWhat happens when our generation is gone? How will the next generation survive?
Most likely they'll be like the generation portrayed in Wall-E. They can't even figure out how to walk!
DeleteLOL Some are already like that!
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