The Keyboard Warrior

I am sure you have come across warriors in your life.

There are those who are the brave firefighters who fight fires to save lives. They are the fire warriors.

Then there are the policemen who risk their lives to protect the citizens from harm and to prevent crime. They are the crime warriors. Protector of the people.

And there are those who battle fatal diseases. Fighting for their lives and yet still full of life. They are warriors too.

And then, there are the keyboard warriors.

Yes.

You read that right.

The keyboard warriors.

I think I heard you blink.

What on earth are keyboard warriors you ask.

They are the online warriors who defend the effigy of truth. They defend it ever so passionately that it makes you want to cry from their audacity sincerity.

Let me enlighten your mind on how the keyboard warriors defend the helpless people in the world of the internet.

1. The Righteous Slappers

Miss A: I've tried your recipe twice and it still isn't happening.
Miss B: (Gives a few more suggestions in order to help Miss A.)
Miss A: What am I going to do with all that I've made which didn't turn out so well?
Miss B: (Gives some other suggestion to Miss A.)
Miss A: I do not know how to make the things you've suggested.
Miss B: If there's really no choice, maybe you would have to throw it away.

Miss A goes livid and starts a new post stating that she wants to SLAP Miss B as she had the sheer audacity to even suggest that she throws away whatever shit awesome creation that she had made. Miss A continues to rant that Miss B lied in her recipe. Thus, the failure in Miss A two attempts in replicating Miss B's recipe. And Miss A continues to rant that she wants to slap Miss B's face as she is so INCENSED at Miss B's 'throw-away' suggestion. 'So wasted you know!!!!!!!! She thinks money grows on trees issit????!!!!!!!!'

2. All Hail the Lover-Keeper-Of-All-Things-Alive

SUZY posts a video of a sickly stray dog near her place. She appeals for someone to help the dog. Soon her post is filled with comments.

A: Why did you not bring the dog to the vet instead of asking for help? Aren't you a hypocrite?
B: Please lah. Be more compassionate. You should bring the dog into your house, bathe it and take care of it. God created all animals and God will love you more if you rescue this dog.
C: Stop judging Suzy you people. I'm sure if she could, she would. Maybe she's not financially well off.
D: STFU you #%*$@&$* C! HOW MUCH DOES IT TAKE TO TAKE CARE OF A SICK DOG???!! MAY YOU BE BITTEN WITH A THOUSAND FLEAS ON A CAMEL'S BACK FOR NOT HAVING COMPASSION FOR THAT POOR DOG!
E: Anyone can help with the dog? If I lived nearby I would. Please, anyone?? My heart is bleeding just watching the video! (CRIES)
F: Someone should just shoot Suzy and C for not doing enough for the dog. It's a living being! (SOBS)
G: #^#**@^#^!^&@&#^!^^@#
H: F*CK!!!!!! How can anyone leave the dog out there to die!!???!!! God help humanity.

Soon, Suzy takes down the post.

3. The Cannot-Take-The-F@CK-Word Holy of Holies Holier Than Thou Art

WEEPY: FML! I had such a F8cking day today! Everything went F*cking wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! F*CK!!!!!!
Saint Anonymous: STOP CURSING AND SWEARING. YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF FOR CURSING AND SWEARING. DID YOUR MOTHER NOT TEACH YOU NOT TO CURSE AND SWEAR???? YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO YOUR MOTHER!!! GO AND REPENT. I HOPE YOU STILL HAVE SOME CONSCIENCE AND WILL REMOVE THIS POST!!! I EXPECT TO SEE THIS POST GONE BY TOMORROW!!!!

4. The Opinion-Slasher

A: I am just voicing my opinion.
B: You should think before you type. You know people like you do not deserve to be in this world. How you could even type out such a thing is beyond me. You should just kill yourself and do justice to this world.

Aren't the keyboard warriors awesome? I think I better go STFU before someone wants to slap me and send me to the dog pound so that justice can be done!