The Keyboard Warrior

I am sure you have come across warriors in your life.

There are those who are the brave firefighters who fight fires to save lives. They are the fire warriors.

Then there are the policemen who risk their lives to protect the citizens from harm and to prevent crime. They are the crime warriors. Protector of the people.

And there are those who battle fatal diseases. Fighting for their lives and yet still full of life. They are warriors too.

And then, there are the keyboard warriors.

Yes.

You read that right.

The keyboard warriors.

I think I heard you blink.

What on earth are keyboard warriors you ask.

They are the online warriors who defend the effigy of truth. They defend it ever so passionately that it makes you want to cry from their audacity sincerity.

Let me enlighten your mind on how the keyboard warriors defend the helpless people in the world of the internet.

1. The Righteous Slappers

Miss A: I've tried your recipe twice and it still isn't happening.
Miss B: (Gives a few more suggestions in order to help Miss A.)
Miss A: What am I going to do with all that I've made which didn't turn out so well?
Miss B: (Gives some other suggestion to Miss A.)
Miss A: I do not know how to make the things you've suggested.
Miss B: If there's really no choice, maybe you would have to throw it away.

Miss A goes livid and starts a new post stating that she wants to SLAP Miss B as she had the sheer audacity to even suggest that she throws away whatever shit awesome creation that she had made. Miss A continues to rant that Miss B lied in her recipe. Thus, the failure in Miss A two attempts in replicating Miss B's recipe. And Miss A continues to rant that she wants to slap Miss B's face as she is so INCENSED at Miss B's 'throw-away' suggestion. 'So wasted you know!!!!!!!! She thinks money grows on trees issit????!!!!!!!!'

2. All Hail the Lover-Keeper-Of-All-Things-Alive

SUZY posts a video of a sickly stray dog near her place. She appeals for someone to help the dog. Soon her post is filled with comments.

A: Why did you not bring the dog to the vet instead of asking for help? Aren't you a hypocrite?
B: Please lah. Be more compassionate. You should bring the dog into your house, bathe it and take care of it. God created all animals and God will love you more if you rescue this dog.
C: Stop judging Suzy you people. I'm sure if she could, she would. Maybe she's not financially well off.
D: STFU you #%*$@&$* C! HOW MUCH DOES IT TAKE TO TAKE CARE OF A SICK DOG???!! MAY YOU BE BITTEN WITH A THOUSAND FLEAS ON A CAMEL'S BACK FOR NOT HAVING COMPASSION FOR THAT POOR DOG!
E: Anyone can help with the dog? If I lived nearby I would. Please, anyone?? My heart is bleeding just watching the video! (CRIES)
F: Someone should just shoot Suzy and C for not doing enough for the dog. It's a living being! (SOBS)
G: #^#**@^#^!^&@&#^!^^@#
H: F*CK!!!!!! How can anyone leave the dog out there to die!!???!!! God help humanity.

Soon, Suzy takes down the post.

3. The Cannot-Take-The-F@CK-Word Holy of Holies Holier Than Thou Art

WEEPY: FML! I had such a F8cking day today! Everything went F*cking wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! F*CK!!!!!!
Saint Anonymous: STOP CURSING AND SWEARING. YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF FOR CURSING AND SWEARING. DID YOUR MOTHER NOT TEACH YOU NOT TO CURSE AND SWEAR???? YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO YOUR MOTHER!!! GO AND REPENT. I HOPE YOU STILL HAVE SOME CONSCIENCE AND WILL REMOVE THIS POST!!! I EXPECT TO SEE THIS POST GONE BY TOMORROW!!!!

4. The Opinion-Slasher

A: I am just voicing my opinion.
B: You should think before you type. You know people like you do not deserve to be in this world. How you could even type out such a thing is beyond me. You should just kill yourself and do justice to this world.

Aren't the keyboard warriors awesome? I think I better go STFU before someone wants to slap me and send me to the dog pound so that justice can be done!

Forever F

Fabulously, freaking fastidious,

Faultless, faddy and flaky,

Flamboyant

Was Freddie of Fourth Avenue.

Freddie was fussy, fat and foul-mouthed,

Favors fable over fact.

Follows feelings,

Faithful?

That's a facade!

Freddie flaunts,

Famously facinorous,

Factious,

Forever fabricates.

Foes more than friends.

Freddie was fame and fortune

Filthy rich

His faith was a falacy

Freddie the false-faced!

February came,

And Freddie fancied a fair fawn,

And fiery was the fair maiden

Freddie flew France to her

The fair-head said, 'Forgo the fat.'

So Freddie fasted to lose the fat

Freddie fixed his flagging flubber

Faithful like the furry friends

With her, he falters

He fancied-sick her,

Fantasied excessively about her,

Behaved fatuously with her.

She was f**ked up,

And yet he facilitated her every demand

Bought her a fleet of cars,

He wanted to be her Flora and Fauna.

He friended every friend on her Facebook (a Faux Pas),

Flattered her father

Finished her mother's flawed and flavourless fig pie,

Oh, she was his fair and foxy fairy!

Fairy tale it was not.

She wanted him to fade away,

The flame was flaked out

He fell from grace

Forbade him to even furnish her with a floral gift.

He fell apart,

He floundered, 

He fainted, 

Fatigued hit him. 

There wasn't going to be a flower girl.

He had flunked. 

He was a failure.

His fantasy flopped.

He was a foreclosure.

He faded away,

He was Freddie.

He was Forever F.

The Accidental Scientist

'All life is an experiment. The more experiments you make, the better.'
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

I never wanted to be a scientist. I hated experiments. I hated the complications. I found it to be tiring and boring. Suffice to say, I had a closed mind. I was plain lazy. I was unmotivated. I did not bother to learn of the new things that came across my path as I only learned what I WANTED to learn. The things that did not interest me was not worth learning. Or so I had thought.

One day as I was minding my own business as usual in my small, shallow world, when an experiment (unexpected and unsuspected by me) conducted by the world's greatest scientist exploded on purpose right in my face and changed my life forever. Of course I was beyond pissed at the 'idiot' who had thought that the experiment was a 'success'. Success my ass. It ruined my life!

All the things that I had taken for granted was gone. All the things that I could do freely was now a once upon a time story. All that I thought that I had, that I was, was a farce. I was an empty shell. I was not a pilgrim of life at all. I realized that I had been in the stagnant, green and murky waters of the swamp for the undead for almost my entire life!

Thus, I was slapped with a very rude awakening.

But I became angry. Violently angry. I was frustrated beyond words. I had become incapacitated. I wished that I had died instead of being brought back to Earth.

I honestly cannot remember when I started to live my life even with my health constantly deteriorating. But I remember very vividly that I had my breakthrough when I started to write. I vented out my frustrations, my setbacks, my failures and my deepest feelings by writing. It set me free. Words that were in the deepest recesses of my heart were poured out as my fingers typed non-stop on the smartphone! Yes, I started writing on my smart phone as my laptop was on the verge of dying. (It was almost 10 years old!)

And so here I am today. Alive but not completely well where my health is concerned. But I have my life back. My mind is alive. And I am one of life's accidental scientist. Everything that I go through in life now is an experiment. And today, I am a willing participant. Of course there are times when the experiments that I conducted exploded in my face! But I am okay with mistakes and failures. And the greatest thing about the experiments in life is that you get to do them at your own pace. And even though you fail, it does not mean that you have failed in life. The results of the experiments in life could be achieved in 1001 different ways. And nobody can tell you that your method is wrong. Or the results are wrong.

My latest experiment in life is branching out as a writer. And I have recently just sold my first article. I am very grateful for that opportunity and this has propelled me to continue to write even more.

This blog will be about my writings on life, and on my works. And I am in the midst on writing my first book.

So fellow scientists, what say you we join together in experimenting life's greatest experiment of all?